2 sons, 2 hospitals, 2 states, 1 Mom torn in 2

2 special sons
2 different hospitals
2 far-apart states
2 broken cars
1 stressed Mom torn in 2

(Thank you, Yvette, for that statement.)

In the past seven months, I have almost lost two sons.  It's almost too much for me to bear.

Seven months ago today I arrived in Bethesda, MD to await Derek's arrival.  So much has happened since then.  When it was time for the kids to start school, I broken heartedly let my children return to NJ to live with my sister.

They have visited many times, but I miss them every day.

On Friday I received a 911 message that my sister was trying to reach me.  My 17 yr old son, Ryan, was being rushed to the Emergency Room.

Ryan is 6'4", skinny as a rail, and he has a gerbil on his face that he calls his goatee.

He was sent home from school not feeling well, and a short time after he arrived home, he collapsed.  At the ER, they determined that he had a spontaneous pnuemothorax.  Tall, skinny, young males are prone to them.  (Watch out, Dr. Diego!)  They immediately placed a chest tube to reinflate the lung and suction out the air.  The doctor later told me that if my sister had not been home, Ryan would not be with us today.  It was a life threatening event.

Needless to say my Friday was not a good day.  I have two broken cars, so I had no easy way to get back to Jersey.  My heart was breaking not being with Ryan during this time.  Finally, I decided to suck it up and rent a car.  I cannot afford it, especially with no job, but I had to get home and I could not wait on the wonderful SFAC to arrange a flight or whatever. 

I arrived back in Jersey at 9 on Friday night, and I stayed in Ryan's room, with the exception of a few hours on Sunday. 

After five days in a civilian hospital, I can unequivocally state there is just no comparison.  WRNMMC is so much better.  What an experience this weekend was.  No fun.

He was finally released on Tuesday morning, and I returned to Bethesda on Tuesday night to assist Derek with oupatient.

Ryan is a trooper.  The kid has amazing stamina and pain tolerance.  He was released with a remaining five percent plural effusion, but the doctor believes he will be okay.  We just have to watch him.

Torn to pieces.  I wanted to be with Derek during his first weekend pass.  I really needed a relaxing weekend to sleep in.  But Ryan needed me, and I wouldn't pass on running to his side.  Then I wanted to stay with Ryan to make sure that he was okay.  But I had to place him in my sister's competent hands so that I could get back to Derek.  The doctors were holding Derek's release until I came back.  They say the first few weeks are very intense, so I want to be there to help Derek and Krystina navigate.  But I want to be with Ryan.  No matter where I am, I am torn.

Derek was told he was being discharged today.  He has been here seven months today.  It would have been poetic justice.  Oh well.  Tomorrow.  Some say it's because they wanted to give me time to get back, and some say it was because he didn't go to the Matc yesterday.  Whatever it is, tomorrow should be the day. 

Yes, things are getting better for Derek, but that doesn't stop the onslaught of stress and difficulties that seem to come out of the woodwork on a daily basis.

I'm still sitting here torn in two.  The stress on my shoulders is starting to break me.  Come on, God.  It's time to start picking on another family.  I need a break.