Saturday, September 17, 2011

Our Miracle

Suzanne got engaged!  Yay!  One of our favorite nurses!  Congratulations, Suzanne!  All of the best to you!
And I added a second to the "stay away from me" list.  Mr. Attitude from yesterday was super defensive again today.  Krystina thinks someone stuck a stick up his butt.  Derek woke up from surgery as he came around the corner, and he was not happy.  I commented, "he is not waking up happy," and this guy got all defensive!  Then he yelled at me to stay out of the room.  Okay, day 49, surgery 26 - I get the drill.  I wasn't going in the room until they got him set up.  Most important - DO NOT EVER yell at a family member.  (fire up the grill.  it's been turned off for weeks, but we need it again.)

Then he had the nerve to come and try to talk to me.  I'm sorry, when I am upset, it is best to leave me alone.  If you do not, I will say something we will both regret.

During rounds this morning, the talk was about Derek moving on up! (toooo the top!  to a DEluxe apartment in the skyyyy! - anyone remember the Jeffersons?)!  The thought was to let him have lunch and see how he did, then move him in the afternoon.  They wanted to discuss it with the trauma team (Dr. Perdue).  Well, Derek slept most of the day and the G-tube wasn't clamped when it should have been so we couldn't see if he tolerated his mashed potatoes.  Leah apologized over and over.  She said it was her fault, she missed it.  I should have noticed it, too.  But I didn't.  That is one of the things I had been watching, but my lack of sleep brain missed it.  At least it wasn't a major thing and it was only an hour.  I appreciated that she was honest, and she did not get defensive.  Leah is orientating and working with Peter.

After his mashed potatoes, Derek wanted PB&J, so Peter ran and got crackers, peanut butter and jelly.  He was so happy running back in with his hands full!  We love Peter.  He is one of our favorites.  And Leah is sweet too.

But it didn't matter that the SICU team was pushing for today for the move.  Dr. Perdue is being more cautious.  He still thinks Derek is too fragile.  He would like to wait until tomorrow, at least.  I love Dr. Perdue.  I think he is really making sure that Derek is given the best care possible and not simply pushing him out.

They asked me how I felt, and I have mixed feelings.  I think it is an important step for Derek's healing, rehabilitation and mental stability, but I am concerned that he is not ready to have less intensive care.
Derek is doing better.  Compared to where he was, he is significantly improved.  But he is still not out of the woods.  He looks so pale and drawn, not the strong, healthy man I knew only a few weeks ago.
He is still tacychardic, breathing rate is fast, O2 levels have been known to decrease, blood levels must be maintained chemically (magnesium, etc.), he requires blood transfusions, his white count is still elevated (16.4 today), he is still on 5 antibiotics, has abscesses in his abdomen, has infections in the system that are still resistent, has pneumonia, has blast wounds that are healing but still stage 3, in need of ongoing surgeries still at 3 a week, facing a flap within the next week or two, facing intensive hand surgery, as well as so many other issues.

I am now a little more level headed than I was when Dr. Ugo first told me that they might not be able to save him and that they almost lost him in the OR.  I was in such shock at the time I couldn't sit down and get details.  I plan to do so over the next several days with Dr. Perdue since Derek let Dr. Ugo go when I had him shackled in the basement so I couldn't leave and continue his rotation at Fort Belvoir. 

I did receive information today that has me shaken to the core.  A  doctor told me that he knew about Derek long before he transferred into the SICU rotation because he was the talk of the hospital, even before he arrived from Germany.  The doctors were concerned about him because of the extent of his injuries.  He is a miracle.  Dr. Perdue had told me he was the sickest person in the hospital.  Of the five who came to Bethesda the same weekend with Derek, the 3 are now outpatients, and the other is at another facility for rehab.

Derek is a miracle.  He should not have survived.  This is amazing to me.  We came so close to not receiving a phone call.... to instead receiving the knock on the door.  Or having the doctor walk in and tell us they did all they could, but....

On that note, I need to go next door and nicely ask my neighbors to please be quiet because it is 21:00 and I am exhausted.  5 hours of sleep each night for the last week has caught up with me.

Good night and God bless.

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